What’s Good about MS?

Hello again my fiends! Life is crazy, and I have been trying to have time to write for a while. We are still working on floors in the upstairs, and it has been exhausting! Worker girl has been back (wannabe trophy wife is somewhere else, at a spa maybe). My technical difficulties are still alive and running, but hopefully my Katelynn can have time to help me this week. They have been getting better, as my dear husband has figured a few thing out!

So I wanted to write a little about my life with Multiple Sclerosis. What could I possibly write that is good about it? There are a lot of tough things. Let me acknowledge that MS attacks people in different places on the brain, so it is different for everyone. I have lesions all over my brain and a little on my spinal cord. Depending on where it attacks is where problems happen. I generally don’t talk about them, since they transformed my life and really affected me. As time has gone on I can talk about it. I had a time of mourning, where I had to mourn the things I would never be able to do again. I am legally blind (won’t change and can’t do anything about it since it’s the optic nerve). My left foot is permanently numb. I drag it when I’m tired. Also tired is a regular part of my life. Lot’s of embarrassing issues show up at random tames. Not fun, but bearable. Other issues come up due to medications, such as infections. MS is a part of my life. I say, “Oh, well We all have issues! That’s one of mine! ” In spite of all the bad, good has come!

I feel like MS might be a result of my immune system saving my life. That’s good, right? I got what I think was viral meningitis and a few weeks later my eyes went wacky and then dark. I hardly got sick as an adult, and I think my body just mistook some white brain matter (myelin) for the bad guys after the illness. There is no real positive reason for anyone getting MS, but that is my guess after helping Anthony get through so much medical schooling. I still got to raise my children with MS. Meningitis could have had a much worse outcome. Going through it, was terrible. I’m grateful I go to raise my three girls. That has been so good!

When I moved to Idaho, I couldn’t get a driver’s license. Right after my eye issues, I used to have the girls in the back seat tell me whether the light was green, and what the signs said. In small town Utah where we were living, we were okay. Idaho didn’t like my eyes. I went to several regular doctors and then several eye doctors, but no one would sign my paper so I could drive. I was put on the blind list and sent a Medicare card. The only paper they would sign was one for the blind audio book library. The audiobook library is so great! I might have lost some independence, but I have great audiobooks to listen to! I also made many friends as I arranged rides for me and the girls, and I even get handicapped parking Who knew that bad, unfixable eyes had bonuses?

Another good thing that MS did for me was slow me down so I could notice those around me. I understand sickness and health issues in a way I never did before. I used to get annoyed by people who used their health to not do things. I still try to not use my health as an excuse ever, but there are definitely times I just can’t get my body to move, no matter what! I value friendships in a deeper way, and love to hear everyone’s stories! Everyone has a story and everyone has issues. So I have MS? Everyone has something! I’m able to listen and notice.

I discovered that there is a lot more that I can do than I initially thought! You see with your brain really, and I have peripheral vision, so my brain has adjusted to my eyes. Most people don’t know I’m legally blind because I don’t act like it. I figure thing out! I can read and write as long as the text is big enough! I have to read E-books, because I can get them big enough to read, but that’s okay. My phone and texts can be adjusted to big as well! I can write, talk, help, work– even mow the lawn and help put in floors! MS does not stop me from living, AN D I WANT TO LIVE THE GOOD!

So, this is not a post about Multiple Sclerosis. This is a post about living a good life in spite of the mountains and challenges put in our life. One of my challenges happens to be MS. What is good about it? Well, I am still alive and I can still live and love and participate! MS is just one challenge! We all have challenges, and there is good that can come from living them!